How do you stay in control of your stuff while you are able and assure that your wishes will be carried out when incapacity or the grim reaper catch up with you? Sorry to rub it in, but at least one of these possibilities is going to happen to you and odds are that both of them will. You have an opinion about the kind of healthcare you want to receive throughout your lifetime and you have an opinion about who should enjoy your stuff when you are done with it. Turning your wishes into reality will require you to act on your opinions and put them down on paper. You need to develop the rulebook — your estate plan — that will give you the final say over your assets and your healthcare.
And remember that your rulebook will need to change over time. In the future, your health, family situation and assets will change. Your comfort with your list of hand-picked decisionmakers who will someday step in and make choices will change. The laws that affect your estate plan will change. With these changes, you will need to adjust your rulebook in order to be confident that your wishes will be followed at every phase of your life — and perhaps beyond your lifetime.
Talk with your trusted advisors about the best way to put your rulebook in place and then how to keep it current as circumstances change.