Category: Wisdoms

  • Grief & Bereavement — Part V

    Clients who start the estate planning process do so with the knowledge that they will die one day. This death awareness comes with some degree of death anxiety, as  well as anticipatory grief.

    Clients may also have preconceived notions about lawyers; they may be concerned about cost. They may be unsure of what estate planning is and how to go about it. They are entering a legal environment that is unfamiliar to them. All of these factors create stress, anxiety and fear.

    But in order for clients to be able to consider important matters — quality of life questions, exploring family relationships and establishing the plan to coordinate their assets with this understanding — clients must be as relaxed and calm as possible. Estate planning attorneys must not only create a physical environment conducive to this process, but we must also maintain a level of calm and comfort, so that the client can continue to give concentrated thought and effort to this task at hand. We must do our best in our interviewing, counseling and facilitating so as not to inadvertently and unnecessarily arouse defensiveness in a client.

    As attorneys, we serve as counselors for our grieving clients to guide each of them through grief as they adapt to the loss and facilitate reentering into life in a meaningful way. But we are not therapists who need to delve into deep-seated issues, neuroses, psychosis, dysfunctions or pathologies in order to fix someone or something. As counselors, we want to address our clients’ daily concerns and issues. In Drs. Darcy Harris and Howard Winokuer’s “Principles and Practice of Grief Counseling,” they suggest that as counselors, we want to do the following:

    • Help clients gain insight and perspective on their situation, behavior, emotions and relationships.
    • Provide a safe place for clients to express feelings and clarify their thoughts.
    • Offer a context for clients’ experiences within a broader perspective (e.g., within a family context, social and political structures, existential viewpoint).
    • Enhance the development of clients’ skills in dealing with painful and distressing situations.
    • Empower clients to become their own best advocates.
    • Facilitate clients’ process of finding and making meaning in their experiences.

    STEPHEN B. YIM, ATTORNEY AT LAW
    2054 S. Beretania St., Honolulu, HI 96826
    808-524-0251 | stephenyimestateplanning.com

    Clients who start the estate planning process do so with the knowledge that they will die one day. This death awareness comes with some degree of death anxiety, as  well as anticipatory grief.

  • Hiring Strangers as Caregivers

    When Hiroko hired a healthcare agency to assist her in caring for her husband, she trusted that the company would provide her with caregivers who were responsible and professional. Unfortunately, this agency sent a “caregiver” who helped herself to Hiroko’s jewelry. This is only one of many cases of caregiver abuse handled by the Office of the Prosecuting Attorney, but it highlights the need for people to become aware of the risks involved when hiring a stranger as a caregiver.

    These are the two agencies that can be contacted to see if any complaints have been made against a licensed care provider service are:

    1) The Better Business Bureau: 808-536-6956
    2) The Consumer Resource Center: 808-587-3222

    Also, seek recommendations from friends who have already gone through the process of finding somebody.

    Things to consider when hiring:

    • Ask the healthcare agency about their workers’ training and experience

    • What kind of coverage does their insurance provide in case there are accidents in the home?

    • What kind of experience do they have in providing the specific care you need for your loved one?

    • What background checks have been done? And what are their rules about the caregivers accepting gifts from their patients?

    Our office has received many complaints over the years about caregivers receiving thousands of dollars in “gifts” and “loans” from their patients. Is there a policy regarding this?

    The above questions may seem too probing to ask, but you must remember, a stranger is going to be entering your home. It is a lot better to know than assume they are the caregivers you envisioned them to be.

    Even when hiring a caregiver outside an agency, it is wise to ask the above questions, as well. Keep in mind that any caregiver is an employee — they are not a family friend or a relative. Problems can arise when employees think of themselves as your pal. They may be more likely to take advantage of you or the family member in need of care.

    If you suspect elder abuse, call these numbers:
    Police: 911 | Adult Protective Services: 808-832-5115
    Elder Abuse Unit: 808-768-7536
    For questions, email ElderAbuse@honolulu.gov

    When Hiroko hired a healthcare agency to assist her in caring for her husband, she trusted that the company would provide her with caregivers who were responsible and professional. Unfortunately, this agency sent a “caregiver” who helped herself to Hiroko’s jewelry. This is only one of many cases of caregiver abuse handled by the Office…

  • Starting Your Estate Planning Journey

    The first steps in your estate planning journey are learning 1) how to stay in control of your stuff while you are able to be in control and 2) how to make sure your wishes are carried out when incapacity or the grim reaper catch up with you. Sorry to rub it in, but there is a 100% probability that at least one of these things is going to happen to you and a 70% probability that both of them will.

    Your estate plan should reflect your choices about such things as the kind of healthcare you will receive throughout your life, as well as who will enjoy your stuff when you are done with it. The only way to make effective choices about these things is to learn what your choices are.

    Choices, Changes & Flexibility

    This is a lifelong challenge, because your choices will change as your circumstances change. Your health is going to change — so will your assets, your comfort with your list of designated decision-makers and the laws that affect your estate plan. As things change, you will need to stay on top of the choices you can make in order to be confident that your wishes will be followed at every phase of your life — and beyond.

    The Sooner the Better

    Let’s say you are thinking about going on an adventure. Where do you want to go? How do you want to get there? Are there any better destinations you might want to consider? Is there a better means of getting you there than the one you originally chose?

    The only way to know the answers to these questions is to do some research, talk with people who have taken similar trips and better yet, talk with folks who have helped lots of people take all kinds of journeys. It’s kind of like asking for directions.

    While I have never regretted asking for directions, I have regretted waiting too long to do so. The sooner you learn about your estate planning options, the sooner you can implement ways to head off problems that are headed your way, even though you don’t know exactly what they are or when they will arrive.

    SCOTT MAKUAKANE, Counselor at Law
    Focusing exclusively on estate planning and trust law.
    808-587-8227 | maku@est8planning.com
    est8planning.com

    The first steps in your estate planning journey are learning 1) how to stay in control of your stuff while you are able to be in control and 2) how to make sure your wishes are carried out when incapacity or the grim reaper catch up with you. Sorry to rub it in, but there…

  • Out-of-Pocket Healthcare Costs

    The number of infants born in the US jumped significantly after World War II and continued to increase through the mid-1960s. Social scientists believe it was the result of the thousands of WWII veterans returning home to a booming economy and GI Bill benefits that provided access to home ownership, encouraging them to marry and start families. These infants born between 1946 and 1964 are known as baby boomers.

    The oldest boomers are well past age 65 and those born at the end of the range will be there soon. According to the most recent US census, the Medicare population is expected to double, along with the number of people drawing Social Security benefits and qualifying for Medicare insurance. Healthcare costs may also increase for approximately 63 million existing Medicare beneficiaries and those “aging in,” as they experience the aging process and health issues that are likely to develop.

    Little has been written about how unprepared boomers are as they find themselves living longer and working past age 65. Unlike the prior generation, boomers must sometimes navigate the post-65 Medicare enrollment process and deal with episodes of illness that can strike unexpectedly. Many boomers are also unprepared for the cost of healthcare premiums and out-of-pocket costs for certain procedures, prescription drugs and non-covered medical expenses.

    In 2023, the standard Medicare Part B premium is $164.90 per month. Unless another entity pays the premium, Medicare beneficiaries must pay as long as they have Medicare Part B. Some Medicare beneficiaries pick up a Medicare Advantage, prescription drug or Medigap plan (Medicare Supplemental Insurance) at an additional ongoing cost. According to Fidelity Investments, the average 65-year-old couple retiring today can expect to pay $275,000 in out-of-pocket health expenses in their lifetimes. At a minimum, boomers need to ask their financial advisors how they will cover these costs in retirement and plan ahead. Boomers need to acknowledge that with longevity comes the need to set aside funds to cover out-of-pocket healthcare costs to stay on track for a healthy and happy retirement.

    GET2INSURANCE.COM FAMILY OFFICE
    1003 Bishop St., Ste. 2700, Honolulu, HI 96813
    800-226-3660 | martha@get2insurance.com
    Get2insurance.com

    The number of infants born in the US jumped significantly after World War II and continued to increase through the mid-1960s. Social scientists believe it was the result of the thousands of WWII veterans returning home to a booming economy and GI Bill benefits that provided access to home ownership, encouraging them to marry and…

  • Tips for Transitioning Into Retirement

    Retirement marks the end of a chapter in your career and the start of a new lifestyle. This unique transition can bring a myriad of emotions, most commonly, excitement and apprehension. If you’re pondering retiring in the next year or so, here are five tips to help you transition smoothly.

    1) Know the transition could take weeks — or even months. You likely spent decades forming a routine around your work schedule. Establishing your new normal of volunteer work, an encore career or helping family will take time. If you are married, remember that your retired status may affect your spouse’s routine, too. Talk openly about how you’re feeling during the transition to keep your spouse in the loop.

    2) Communicate your retirement plans with family members. Your parents, kids or other family members will likely be interested in how you intend to spend your retirement days. Will you be visiting the grandkids more often? Will you continue to host family get-togethers? Are you planning to move or purchase a retirement home? As you share your plans, don’t forget to discuss your financial picture. The benefits of open communication are three-fold:

    • It reassures your kids that you’re financially prepared;

    • allows you to introduce or remind your family of your estate and legacy plans;

    • and establishes a safe space for both sides to discuss potentially challenging financial topics.

    3) Maintain healthy habits. Staying diligent with the activities that help you feel your best is important as you shift into retirement. Prioritize eating healthy, sleeping well, staying fit and maintaining friendships in your new routine.

    4) Evaluate your finances. Prior to retirement, you likely outlined how you will manage your cash flow. (If not, today is the day to put a plan in place!) As you enter  retirement, review your expenses to ensure they’re aligned with your plan. It’s common to revise your spending and activities after experiencing the first few weeks away from your primary job, so it’s okay if you need to adjust how much you withdraw from your accounts each month. If you want to increase your spending, calculate what that means for your later retirement years, as you don’t want your savings to come up short. Consult a financial advisor for guidance on how to make your money last while living the lifestyle you desire.

    5) Reset your attitude. Retirement is not the ultimate finish line. Experiencing a lot of emotions is common, but try to focus on what you’re excited about in this next chapter. And remember, you’re not alone. Talk to friends, family and professionals in your life for support along the way.

    MICHAEL W. K. YEE, CFP,® CFS,® CLTC, CRPC®
    1585 Kapiolani Blvd., Ste. 1100, Honolulu, HI 96814
    808-952-1240 | michael.w.yee@ampf.com
    ameripriseadvisors.com/michael.w.yee
    Michael W. K. Yee, CFP®, CFS®, CLTC, CRPC ®, is a Private Wealth Advisor, Certified Financial Planner ™ practitioner, with Ameriprise Financial Services, LLC. in Honolulu, HI. He specializes in fee-based financial planning and asset management strategies and has been in practice for 38 years. Investment advisory products and services are made available through Ameriprise Financial Services, LLC, a registered investment adviser. Investment products are not insured by the FDIC, NCUA or any federal agency, are not deposits or obligations of, or guaranteed by any financial institution, and involve investment risks including possible loss of principal and fluctuation in value. Ameriprise Financial Services, LLC. Member FINRA and SIPC.© 2023 Ameriprise Financial, Inc. All rights reserved.

    Retirement marks the end of a chapter in your career and the start of a new lifestyle. This unique transition can bring a myriad of emotions, most commonly, excitement and apprehension. If you’re pondering retiring in the next year or so, here are five tips to help you transition smoothly.

  • Grief & Bereavement — Part IV

    Portrait of depressed senior man crying during therapy session with female psychiatrist trying to console himAll grief starts as anticipatory grief. Dr. Daniel Miller defines the term “anticipatory grief” as the “process of grieving that starts prior to a loved one passing away.”

    Certainly, acute anticipatory grief comes into one’s consciousness upon the diagnosis of a terminal illness of oneself or of a loved one. A more chronic and less intense grief starts much earlier in life, when we realize at a young age that we and our loved ones will eventually die. This realization leads to a flood of  overwhelming emotions that leave us breathless for a moment — anticipatory grief. But this anticipatory grief allows the family to prepare for the inevitable loss of a loved one.

    Grief starts much earlier than a diagnosis of a terminal illness and inches, sometimes barely noticeably, throughout each person’s lifetime. And, of course, each person experiences grief differently.

    Our understanding and skill in the estate planning process intersects with the client’s fear of death and anticipatory grief. In no other area of the law is it more essential that estate planning attorneys understand their role as counselors. In order to assist the client in making meaningful and well thought-out decisions with respect to their estate plan, attorneys must continually refine their counseling skills.

    STEPHEN B. YIM, ATTORNEY AT LAW
    2054 S. Beretania St., Honolulu, HI 96826
    808-524-0251 | www.stephenyimestateplanning.com

    All grief starts as anticipatory grief. Dr. Daniel Miller defines the term “anticipatory grief” as the “process of grieving that starts prior to a loved one passing away.”

  • Beware of Romance Scams

    Data from the Federal Trade Commission show that more consumers than ever report falling prey to romance scamming, also called “catphishing.” The total reported lost over the past five years has now reached $1.3 billion.

    How Do They Do It?

    Scammers create fake profiles on dating sites, apps and social media platforms in order to offer relationships and companionship to unsuspecting seniors. They may mention a common friend and/or the same interests or hobbies as you. They say they are lonely and seek companionship. Conversations will be brief and frequent.

    Once they feel they have good rapport with you, they will mention financial hardships or they will say they want to travel from afar to meet you, but don’t have the means to do so. They may even say they had been recently scammed online. They will not ask for assistance directly, but will wait for you to offer it.

    They will be reluctant at first, but will finally accept your assistance. They will instruct their target to wire money to a bank account, or via Western Union or an online payment service like PayPal. They may also ask for a cashier’s check. One very big red flag is if they ask for gift cards or prepaid credit cards.

    The amount they ask for is usually small at first, but soon they will make up some excuse for needing more funds. They will resist meeting in person or even video chatting. They may agree to a phone call, but it will be very brief and rare.

    They will continue their scam until the money runs out or until their mark says they are going to inform a family member or friend about the relationship. But by then it may be too late.

    Red Flags

    • Their profile seems too good to be true.
    • They contact you frequently and progress the relationship quickly.
    • They make professions of love far too early.
    • They live very far away.
    • They can’t visit, call, video call or send many pictures.
    • They ask for money.
    • They require specific payment methods.

    Prevention Tips
    • Remember that not everything you see online is true.
    • Talk about your online relationship with a family member or trusted friend.
    • Never give out personal or financial information to someone you have never met in person (email and home addresses, telephone numbers, account numbers and information).
    • Ask them to set up a video call, but be very wary of the link they send you. It might redirect you to a site where malware and/or spyware will infect your devices.
    • Never send money to someone you haven’t met in person.

    If you feel you are a victim of a romance scam, contact your local law enforcement agency immediately. Provide them with all the information you have about the scammer, including financial records showing your payments to him or her.

    Do not feel ashamed! Anyone can be affected by a romance scam, but sadly, scammers often target the elderly, who may be lonely or struggling to find emotional connection.

    Contact me with questions about online security.
    Christopher Duque | aikea808@gmail.com

    Data from the Federal Trade Commission show that more consumers than ever report falling prey to romance scamming, also called “catphishing.” The total reported lost over the past five years has now reached $1.3 billion. How Do They Do It?

  • Leaving a Legacy of Aloha

    Estate planning involves protecting what is important and then passing it on to our loved ones and future generations. Many concepts central to Hawaiian culture are applicable to estate planning. Starting with the concept of ‘ohana (an inclusive notion of family), all the way through lokahi (unity — especially appropriate at the passing of a loved one), estate planning and the culture of our islands can interweave to form a rich tapestry of aloha.

    Ha‘aha‘a describes an attitude of humility, which promotes family harmony at stressful times. Stress may arise in dealing with illness and death, and it may arise in dealing with the distribution of assets. It takes humility for family members to form closer bonds at these times.

    Sometimes, dealing with issues surrounding the disposition of a loved one’s remains, much less the disposition of assets, requires family members to talk out differences and come to consensus regarding what is the right, or pono, thing to do, as well as respecting the wishes of the deceased and the living. It is not uncommon for different family members to have different views of what a deceased person’s wishes were in various contexts. This may result in disagreements that can be both heated and destructive.

    Ho‘oponopono is an option at times of family disagreement. It is a delicate process that enables family members to express their views and come to understanding of alternative perspectives. Although ho‘oponopono may be employed after the fact in resolving disputes, it can also be used while the senior family member is still alive to head off disputes and instill unity in the family. A successful ho‘oponopono requires the sensitive leadership of a moderator who is not involved in the dispute and who can make sure that all perspectives are expressed and validated.

    Finally, the concept of mālama, or caring for and perpetuating one’s legacy, infuses and motivates Hawaiian-style estate planning. This extends from caring for one’s family to caring for one’s community through charitable giving.

    Remembering our root values helps us to leave a legacy of aloha.

    SCOTT MAKUAKANE, Counselor at Law
    Focusing exclusively on estate planning and trust law.
    www.est8planning.com
    808-587-8227 | maku@est8planning.com

    Estate planning involves protecting what is important and then passing it on to our loved ones and future generations. Many concepts central to Hawaiian culture are applicable to estate planning. Starting with the concept of ‘ohana, all the way through lokahi, estate planning and the culture of our islands can interweave to form a rich…

  • Money Management for Couples

    Life partners need to be on the same page about money.

    We all know couples who fight about money. You may even be in a relationship where finances are a source of tension. It’s no mystery why these kinds of conflicts are so common — money fuels our ability to take care of ourselves and our dependents. Managing it requires discipline and a plan, but often, couples don’t see eye-to-eye on what that means. When long-term committed partners share their finances, but not the same values and habits regarding money, friction often ensues. Fortunately, as with most things, clear and open communication can help. Here are four question to facilitate an honest and productive conversation with your spouse or partner about money.

    1) How are expenses managed?

    If you are soon to be married or living together, you need to determine how your money will be combined (joint checking and savings accounts or separate accounts) and who will be responsible for each household expense. If you’ve been together for some time, your primary focus is to make sure that you’re living within your means and that there is transparency about all money matters. To the extent you take on debt or make large purchases, it needs to be an amount both parties are comfortable with.

    2) What are today’s financial priorities?

    These can change from time to time, but it’s important for couples to frequently discuss what is important to them. For example, young couples may want to determine if they should set money aside for a down payment on a house. Some may want to prioritize spending on vacations. Later in life, couples need to think about how they plan to spend their time (and money) in retirement. These issues should be discussed frequently.

    3) What are your long-term goals?

    These tend to vary based on your age and are likely to change, to some extent, over the course of your lives. As a young couple, putting money aside for higher education (your own or your children’s) may be one of your priorities. Even though retirement may be a long way off, the sooner you begin saving for that goal, the better. Those who are older may be primarily focused on retirement and the disposition of their estate. Sitting down with a financial advisor can be beneficial regardless of your age. An advisor will gather input from both parties and craft a plan to help guide your long-term financial decision-making.

    4) Is proper paperwork in place?

    For couples who plan to get married, there might be reasons to consider a pre-nuptial agreement. It spells out how assets are to be divided in case of divorce. Most importantly, it limits costs related to litigation should divorce occur, as the parties agreed in advance on how assets will be split. For older couples, making sure estate documents are in place is important. The issues are trickier in cases of blended families. In both cases, seeking solid legal guidance is important.

    Bottom Line

    When it comes to money, communication is key, so talking about it regularly is important. For couples, limiting financial surprises , such as long-standing debt or large purchases, can go a long way to building a healthy, team-oriented approach to budgeting and managing money.

    MICHAEL W. K. YEE, CFP,® CFS,® CLTC, CRPC®
    1585 Kapiolani Blvd., Ste. 1100, Honolulu, HI 96814
    808-952-1240 | michael.w.yee@ampf.com
    www.ameripriseadvisors.com/michael.w.yee
    Michael W. K. Yee, CFP®, CFS®, CLTC, CRPC ®, is a Private Wealth Advisor, Certified Financial Planner ™ practitioner, with Ameriprise Financial Services, LLC. in Honolulu, HI. He specializes in fee-based financial planning and asset management strategies and has been in practice for 38 years.

    Investment advisory products and services are made available through Ameriprise Financial Services, LLC, a registered investment adviser.

    Investment products are not insured by the FDIC, NCUA or any federal agency, are not deposits or obligations of, or guaranteed by any financial institution, and involve investment risks including possible loss of principal and fluctuation in value.

    Ameriprise Financial Services, LLC. Member FINRA and SIPC.
    © 2022 Ameriprise Financial, Inc. All rights reserved.

    We all know couples who fight about money. You may even be in a relationship where finances are a source of tension. It’s no mystery why these kinds of conflicts are so common — money fuels our ability to take care of ourselves and our dependents. Managing it requires discipline and a plan, but often,…

  • Grief & Bereavement — Part III

    Facing one’s mortality is the unspoken uneasiness that rests just below the surface of the conversation with an estate planning attorney.

    Estate planning attorneys are well-versed in the law of estate planning. But as they focus heavily on probate avoidance and tax minimization, they may overlook the emotional, human side of estate planning. Therefore, the best estate planning attorneys are counselors of law with the emphasis on counselor more than law.

    While clients express their needs in avoiding probate and minimizing tax, estate planning attorneys must remember that underlying each and every client’s need is a deeper foundational need — a relational one — wanting to ensure that they do not burden their survivors with complex legal, administrative and financial matters. Clients want to make sure that whatever they own in material wealth smoothly passes onto the survivors and that the survivors can make good use of these assets to enhance their lives.

    Clients must simply remember that after they pass, life doesn’t stop for their loved ones. So by leaving affairs in order — including financial, legal and tax issues — undue stress will be eliminated for your loved ones, who can then focus on your life, memory and legacy as they grieve.

    STEPHEN B. YIM, ATTORNEY AT LAW
    2054 S. Beretania St., Honolulu, HI 96826
    808-524-0251 | stephenyimestateplanning.com

    Facing one’s mortality is the unspoken uneasiness that rests just below the surface of the conversation with an estate planning attorney. Estate planning attorneys are well-versed in the law of estate planning. But as they focus heavily on probate avoidance and tax minimization, they may overlook the emotional, human side of estate planning. Therefore, the…

  • Wise Charitable Giving

    Charities depend on gifts from people like us to do their good works. That’s why they are not shy about asking us for money. Here are some ideas about maximizing your charitable gifts.

     Do your homework. The good works that charities do often overlap, and some charities operate more efficiently than others. Websites like charitynavigator.org and charitywatch.org can help you rate and compare established charities to find out how much of your gift will go to actual charitable work versus the charity’s  administrative and fundraising overhead. Of course, it costs money to run a charity, and it also costs money to raise money. However, if these expenses exceed
    25 percent of a charity’s revenue, you should consider alternatives.

     Don’t sell an appreciated asset to make a cash gift. If you own Apple stock that you bought for $10 per share, don’t sell it now at $175 per share to raise the cash to make a charitable gift. You will get an income tax deduction for your gift, but you will also be liable for capital gains tax on the difference between the $175 sale price of the stock and the $10 that you spent to buy it. You will have less after-tax cash to give the charity, and your deduction will be limited to the amount of your cash gift Instead, give the stock to the charity. This way, you will make a bigger gift and get a bigger deduction.Your deduction will be the full fair market value of the gifted stock. {Play}

     Consider making gifts from your retirement plans. If you give retirement plan assets to your loved ones after you die, they will have to pay income tax on those gifts. So name charities as beneficiaries of your retirement plans and give your non-taxable assets to individuals. If you have reached the age when you must take required minimum distributions (RMDs) from your retirement plan, you can direct up to $100,000 of your annual RMD to go to charity. You will not get a deduction, but you will not have to pay income tax on the gifted portion of your RMD. This works out better for you than a deduction.

    SCOTT MAKUAKANE, Counselor at Law
    Focusing exclusively on estate planning and trust law.
    est8planning.com
    808-587-8227 | maku@est8planning.com

    Charities depend on gifts from people like us to do their good works. That’s why they are not shy about asking us for money. Here are some ideas about maximizing your charitable gifts.