Category: Column

Eh! Nevah Mind Da Kine, Now is NOW

Well, Generations wanted me to expound on the inevitable and that is…dying. I can safely say that I know something about dying because for many years as a stand-up comedian, I died many times on stage. It’s not a good feeling. However, once I passed through that uncomfortable moment and came out on the other side, I was refreshed and stronger. Hopefully, in your passing you will also feel much more refreshed and stronger. That being said, wouldn’t it be interesting to find out that the knowledge we have about death and dying is all wrong!

WHAT IF! While on this earth, say we receive a letter every twenty years from God. This letter is God is giving you a review. Every 20, 40, 60 years and so on you receive a letter that hopefully is going to give you a passing grade. And if you keep that up, eventually you’ll receive your golden ticket to heaven at the age of 80. And if you haven’t taken care of business that the LORD recommended when you reach 80, sorry — you’re going to have to stand in line with a lot of other people. And as for me? I can see one of my letters saying “Hey Frank, this is the Lord’s assistant and the Heavenly Father wants me to pass on his 40 year review to you. There is one aspect of your life the Heavenly Father strongly urges you to pay attention to and that is ‘Learn the words to the songs you’re going to sing on stage!!!!! ALSO PLEASE STAY ON KEY!’ When Heavenly Father hears you go off key he shakes his head, closes his eyes and prays for you. OK? That will make Heavenly Father very happy and we want to keep Heavenly Father very HAPPY or he’s going to come down there and rearrange some furniture. And if you upset Heavenly Father, we’ll send you to a place where you’ll need a lot of sun block!! Get my drift? Got it? Good!”

But what really happens when you die, pass over, pass out, pass gas, kaput, game over, no time left, make — die — dead? Many have come back from the other side to tell us. Moe Keale told me that, after he had flatlined, he walked towards a light that turned out to be a 7-11. I know that sounds absurd but that’s what he told me. And as he walked toward the door, his nephew Israel Kamakawiwo‘ole came walking out with a slurpee all happy and smiling. But when he saw Moe, he said “Unko, what you doing hea? It’s not your time, you gotta go back!” So Moe came back to tell the story. He also said that while he was transitioning back, all he heard were harps and ‘ukuleles.

So this is what I do know: the reality of life is always NOW. The past is a memory which is a thought arising in the present. The future is merely anticipated and is just another thought arising now. What we truly have is this moment. If you stay connected to the present moment and find fulfillment here and now, you will always have a 7-11 heaven. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Well, Generations wanted me to expound on the inevitable and that is…dying. I can safely say that I know something about dying because for many years as a stand-up comedian, I died many times on stage. It’s not a good feeling.
In Celebration of Organ Donor Legacies

If you could save a life, would you? We are all asked this vital question at the DMV. Checking the box YES to be an organ or tissue donor means we are willing to selflessly pass on the gift of life to those desperately in need.

On Saturday, April 29, more than 240 people from across the Hawaiian islands came together to honor and celebrate their deceased loved ones who gave the gift of life to patients in critical need of a life-saving organ or restorative tissue. Hosted by Legacy of Life Hawai‘i, the Donor Remembrance Ceremony was held in Kaneohe.

The all-day, heartwarming event included reflections from an organ donor’s son, Sean Cervone, whose mother tragically passed away suddenly and became an organ donor. Sean Keoni Craig, a double lung and kidney transplant recipient, followed with a powerful Hawaiian chant to his ancestors and a heartfelt message of gratitude for his organ donor. He shared his hopes to one day meet the family of the donor.

Afterward, Tracy Lodge spoke about her beloved son, Brandon, who became an organ donor after he passed away suddenly after a traffic accident. She recalled fondly how Brandon was cherished for his generous spirit by his friends, family, and the Kailua community where he lived. In a touching moment, she was introduced for the first time to the grateful transplant recipient who received her son’s liver.

Donor families were invited to create a commemorative lantern in memory of their loved ones. On display in the ballroom were the five panels of the Hawaii Donor Quilt created in a heartfelt tribute to those who gave the gift of life and whose legacies live on in transplant recipients. The event ended with the poignant release of monarch butterflies, symbolizing the renewed hope that their loved ones gave to the many transplant recipients by consenting to organ and tissue donation.

The need for organ, eye, and tissue donors continues to grow, as it is a pressing issue. There are at present 322 patients in Hawai‘i suffering from end-stage organ failure and waiting for a life-saving kidney, pancreas or liver. More than 114,000 patients in the United States are in the same critical condition. To register as an organ, eye and tissue donor, visit registerme.org and help make a difference.

LEGACY OF LIFE HAWA‘I (501(c) 3 nonprofit)
405 N Kuakini St STE 810, Honolulu, HI 96817
808-599-7630 | info@legacyoflifehawaii.org
legacyoflifehawaii.org
Legacy of Life Hawai’i is an organization in Hawai’i federally designated to recover organs and tissue for transplant; encourage organ donation through community outreach and education; and honor and support donor families by working closely with island hospitals to cultivate an understanding in community diversity that life is worth giving.

If you could save a life, would you? We are all asked this vital question at the DMV. Checking the box YES to be an organ or tissue donor means we are willing to selflessly pass on the gift of life to those desperately in need.
My Story: A Life-Changing Health Scare

I was sitting outside an Ala Moana Hotel meeting room texting on my phone. Suddenly, I looked up. I had no idea where I was.

I realized I was actually lying on the floor and looking at the walls and ceiling. Sweat seemed to be pouring down my face. I reached up to wiped the perspiration, only to discover it was blood. Soon a physical therapist appeared, asking me to follow his finger with my eyes. He asked me to raise my hands above my head, then to smile. He said I didn’t have a stroke or heart attack.

As he helped me to the restroom to clean up, fear possessed me. My thoughts raced. I went to the emergency room and spent three nights in the hospital. I had numerous tests.

I reflected on my life while I waited for the results. I had great parents and a loving family. I got married to a loving wife. We share great children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. Nothing has been more enjoyable than seeing my family grow. I’ve also been lucky to see our family business grow.

Balancing my family, church responsibilities, and work has not always kept me busy. I walk 4-5 miles every Saturday. At 74 years old, I didn’t feel old. Sure, I take pills for hypertension and cholesterol. I knew I needed to lose 40 pounds. Still, I thought I was in good health. I felt good.

Sitting in the hospital, I wondered: Do I have a legacy to pass on to my family? Are my affairs in order? How do I make the most of my remaining years? Questions kept arising.

Happily, my medical tests came back negative. Six months have now passed since my blackout.

I’ve been trying to make the most of this second chance to change my lifestyle. I walk three times a week. It helps me with my balance. I’ve cut down on carbs — including rice. I eat only one big meal a day. The other two meals are small meals. I eat no junkies, except to keep my wife company during our TV nights.

I introduced naps into my afternoon routine. My naps normally last between two and three hours. Occasionally I can nap for five hours. Now I realize there is great value in taking this time to refresh myself.

I’ve slowed down my life, even though some still think I’m working too hard. This is what happens when you love what you do, I suppose. My new business is gratifying; I love going to work. My wife claims that I don’t work but just go to talk stories.

I hope sharing this one can help inspire you to slow down a bit, too. Life is too short anyway.

FINANCIAL BENEFITS INSURANCE INC.
1311 Kapiolani Blvd., Ste. 504, Honolulu, HI 96814
808-792-5194 | emotosue@fbihi.com
fbihi.com | FB: Financial Benefits Insurance

I was sitting outside an Ala Moana Hotel meeting room texting on my phone. Suddenly, I looked up. I had no idea where I was. I realized I was actually lying on the floor and looking at the walls and ceiling. Sweat seemed to be pouring down my face. I reached up to wiped the…
The Houseless Are Not Homeless

Lisa Darcy has been an advocate for the houseless and disabled for decades.

Growing up modestly in a suburb of Chicago, I remember the first time we went camping. I was so excited, because this was a family vacation. My brothers and sisters helped pack the hot dogs and buns, collected our sleeping bags and pillows, and gathered wood for the fire. We were thrilled to eat canned beans! It was an exciting adventure… until the doorbell rang.

This, of course was not camping, even though that’s what we called it. We had a bathroom, electricity, a phone, safety and privacy.

Let’s shift the paradigm. Welcome to a tiny sliver of insight that informs our community fabric. I invite you to walk with me into a poorly studied, and wholly misunderstood and often stigmatized crisis.

Is the term homeless or houseless? The term you chose is an important focal point for lighting a path forward. Determining the nature of these conditions is significant in reimagining community safety for all community members. Understanding the difference in terms allows us to reconsider our approaches and partnerships.

Share Your Mana Advisory Committee
Member Jess and Founder Lisa Darcy
deliver supplies in February 2021.

The term “homeless” is a mainland idea, not a Maui idea. It is an overarching category which can result in harm, no matter how unintentional. The difference has been shared with me over and over from almost all the community members I’ve met. “I am home. Maui is my home. I just don’t have a house,” says Ku‘uipo from her tent. Of Hawaiian descent, she articulates displacement beautifully and with authority.

To get at core needs, the use of language and current context are critical, because the conditions in which many in Maui County and around the world are living need to be accurately portrayed with honesty, integrity and dignity. There are many terms that have emerged to help explain the levels of needs — unhoused, unsheltered, houseless, homeless and housing-insecure. Regardless of the category or term, I’ve seen how emotionally overwhelming — often paralyzing — these conditions are.

started Maui-based nonprofit Share Your Mana (SYM) to meet the needs of moments like these. As an extremely inquisitive and distinctive care provider, I approach every interaction the only way I know how — through the unique lens of those in crisis. It is often quite uncomfortable, messy and painful, and still these raw, genuine interactions always culminate in inspiration.

SYM is driven by reviewing experiences which serve and by possessing the resolve to evolve through reflections on the failures that hinder success. And to improve how we approach restoring a healthy community balance, we need to create the space to move through whatever emotions follow. I call it, “decompressing emotions.”

Most of us understand that by the time someone is living unhoused or unsheltered, there must be multiple categories of need that are overstressed. Without an actual, affordable, safe sleeping inventory, when a slow boil of problems spills over, it is easy to slide into crisis.

Imagine leaving to do errands after the doors were removed from your home. That is the situation many living in camps and vehicles find themselves in, so Lisa sometimes helps out by serving as a “watch person” so belongings stay safe.

There is a common association that those who are living in “subhuman conditions” are dangerous and to be feared. I spent the entire pandemic with hundreds living unhoused, every single day and most nights bringing life-sustaining supplies. I found many grappling with these conditions who also have an amazing ability to manage the negative stereotypes. I have witnessed love and respect alongside deep pain — often, generational pain.

Healing requires dignity, consistency and the concept that no matter why you are where you are, this community believes every person deserves the components of Maslow’s pyramid — physiological needs, safety, love and belonging, esteem and self-actualization.

As a child, there was no way I could understand that camping in our living room was much different than the daily experience of the unhoused, unsheltered, houseless, homeless and housing-insecure. There was a toilet nearby, a refrigerator stocked with food and electricity to light my way. And yet, I still recall my fantasy
— how wonderful it was to “get away.”

Many live in conditions with no toilet or ability to sleep soundly in clean sheets or even a sleeping bag. These conditions exacerbate the situation, often creating a person who is fearful, guarded and even defiant. When you are unable to keep clean, your self-esteem is ripped away. Then decompensating happens — the person’s mental health deteriorates. For the unsheltered, it is an especially traumatic process because it happens in public, for everyone to see.

As we go deeper into 2023, housing resources will no doubt continue to tighten. Only one small financial mishap can sometimes lead to housing insecurity and becoming unhoused. This is a frightening thought for most of us… the stuff of nightmares.

One day, I hope this will not evoke fear, because we have invested in safe sleeping for all residents. My hope for 2023 is that we invest in reframing solutions with safe sleeping in mind, a concept that will uplift talents, abilities and our humanity.

Then we can all sleep better as we see improved policy and actions that help to raise our community dignity.

“Share Your Mana has helped me in so many ways,” says Darren, who lived in his non-drivable car during the pandemic. “They never let me down no matter what I needed and I needed a lot. Share Your Mana help me mentally, physically and emotionally and has made me a brand new person. Share Your Mana has made me stronger than I ever was. I have seen Lisa do so much for others, so then I joined her advisory committee, becoming one of the leaders to make a better future for the unhoused community. While on the committee, I’ve seen unhoused people become housed and many housed people become unhoused. The cycle will never stop unless we can put a stop to it, change the cycle and initiate action that helps the unhoused community become stronger with the help of state and county officials who want to make a change for the good of the people.”

Growing up modestly in a suburb of Chicago, I remember the first time we went camping. I was so excited, because this was a family vacation. My brothers and sisters helped pack the hot dogs and buns, collected our sleeping bags and pillows, and gathered wood for the fire. We were thrilled to eat canned…
Overcoming the Distance Between Us

Whether the distance spans countries or oceans, living separated from your loved ones is always difficult — especially when the loved ones are our elders — namely, our grandparents. My Lolo and Lola (the Filipino words for grandfather and grandmother) often took care of me and my sisters from the time we were born. But they moved back to the Philippines when I was 12 years old, and I only visited them once in the decade they’ve been gone.

It’s a normal part of living on a small island to not have your entire family living nearby. Many of us can relate to having grandparents from the Philippines or other countries who either moved back there or never left, while we reside Hawai‘i. Everyone has their own way of dealing with such absence, but I think one sentiment remains true for us all: Love knows no distance and it never can be diminished.

Just last summer, my Lolo passed away. Coping with his passing has been challenging, not only because of the grief, but because of the way the distance between us altered the loss somehow. His absence existed unwavering both before and after his passing. Thus, I’ve often found myself meditating on this question: How does love triumph over distance or death?

Loss is inevitable. It is said that grief is love with no place to go. As a consolation, we sometimes turn to those around us, the internet and other distractions to find ways of coping with the anguish that ensues. It can become easy to lose ourselves in feelings of loss, to a point where love becomes overshadowed by grief and sorrow. Remembrances of the past and hope for the future exist on opposite sides of time, and yet, they are our greatest strengths in these moments. Bittersweet memories lend support to the hope for an eventual reunion and the desire to never lose the bond that transcends worldly distance. Therefore, love endures because it, like memories shared, can never be taken from us. As long as we are able to remember warm embraces and handwritten birthday cards, the love woven into the tapestry of our memories serves as an unbreakable tether.

I still feel my Lolo’s love very near to me. He planted a pomelo tree in our yard when he lived with us. Today, the tree stands stately and tall, unbending and strong — a symbol of his love, which will always be with me, though he is not.

I write this story as a means of honoring and remembering my Lolo, because my words are the only way I know how to show my love for him now. His love remains — equally abstract and tangible; the bitterness and sweetness of fresh pomelo bear the same significance as me knowing that he is always with me. No matter the distance, love brings us close.

Whether the distance spans countries or oceans, living separated from your loved ones is always difficult — especially when the loved ones are our elders — namely, our grandparents.
Spring Cleaning for Your Computer

Many of us include the ritual of spring cleaning around this time of year. Spring cleaning is all about tackling the areas you may have neglected during the rest of the year. And nothing is more satisfying than a sparkling clean home, right? But don’t forget about your computer and devices. Backing up data, cleaning up storage, maintenance and changing passwords are things that most of us miss throughout the year. Therefore, you might want to consider adding the following tasks to your official spring cleaning checklist:

 Back Up Your Data: Back up all your important data, such as photos, records, documents and your calendar, contact list and emails, etc. Back up anything you feel is important and irreplaceable. My advice is to back up your data to an external hard drive that has its own power source (AC adapter) or burn your data to CDs/DVDs. USB flash drives are not meant for long-term storage. The other option is storing your data remotely, such as to iCloud or Google Drive.

 Clean Up Your Storage: After backing up your data, start deleting apps, programs and files that you rarely use or are outdated. This alone can speed up your computer. Again, do this after backing up you computer.

 Maintenance: If you are tech savvy, you can purchase utility programs that perform low-level diagnostics on your computer that will check your computer’s hardware and the operating system, and will make recommendations on how to remedy any problems. Depending on the program, it may even resolve those issues for you. My advice is to see a professional service to do the examination and any subsequent fixes if any problems are found. Usually, this can be done by the service department where you purchased your computer. There are also local service providers that can do similar work, but choose reputable vendors.

 Change Passwords: Lastly, change your passwords, not only for logging into your computer and other devices, but also internet services that require a password. You don’t have to change them all at one time, but start with your computer and cellphone passwords. Write them down in a notebook along with the date you made the changes. Secure the notebook in a safe place.

Warning: Keeping passwords on your computer, cellphone or other devices is not recommended. Neither is keeping them in your wallet or purse.

Contact me with questions about online security. Christopher Duque | aikea808@gmail.com

Many of us include the ritual of spring cleaning around this time of year. Spring cleaning is all about tackling the areas you may have neglected during the rest of the year. And nothing is more satisfying than a sparkling clean home, right? But don’t forget about your computer and devices.
Eating Together

Here in Hawai‘i, the idea of multiple generations sharing meals together under one roof isn’t reserved for just the holidays. Hawai‘i has the highest percentage of multigenerational households in the country, with nearly 8 percent of households statewide classified as multigenerational — at least three generations living under one roof. This household structure represents one of the most beautiful things about Hawai‘i. It embodies the word ‘ohana and exemplifies the concept of an extended family. The people within it are bound by a genuine sense of mālama, kokua and kuleana. Especially during the holidays, compassion, loyalty and aloha radiate throughout the home.

While tradition plays a significant role for families living together, the decision can’t be entirely linked to cultural sensibilities. For a lot of families, it’s a necessity due to the state’s high cost of living — the highest in the country. The pandemic has only exacerbated the lack of affordable housing. In order to make rent, many local families have no choice but to pool their incomes just to keep a roof over their heads — and more obstacles abound — obstacles like hunger.

But food insecurity and hunger don’t affect everyone in the household equally. Keiki and kūpuna are especially vulnerable. In these extraordinarily trying times, as parents often work multiple jobs to provide extra support, kūpuna may try to ensure food security for their grandchildren by foregoing their own needs. Therefore grandparents in multigenerational households can experience hunger at more than twice the rate of those in homes with no grandchildren. Through their own sacrifice, members of a household in Hawai‘i never lose sight of what it means to take care of one another.

But to help ensure every member of the household has the nourishment they need, Hawai‘i Foodbank offers special nutritional support through programs such as Food 4 Keiki, ‘Ohana Produce Plus, the Senior Food Box Program, and new initiatives like the Seniors Farmers’ Market Nutrition Program.

Hawai‘i Foodbank works closely with its network of more than 200 food partner agencies to provide food for families affected by the pandemic while continuing to provide assistance to those who were already struggling with hunger.

No longer associated with a stigma, these free resources provide an akamai strategy for kūpuna and their ‘ohana. It is simply a sign of the times for many seniors and their families.

FOOD 4 KEIKI

Hunger deprives our keiki of more than just food. The fact is, a child’s chance for a bright tomorrow starts with getting enough nutritious food to eat today.

Ensuring our keiki receive the nutrition they need to excel in school relieves the pressure on kūpuna who sacrificed their own needs. The Food 4 Keiki School Pantry Program serves as a critical food resource for young students, their siblings and their families. The school pantries provide after-school snacks for young students, as well as additional family food bags to take home. Bags are filled with canned proteins, canned meals, dry goods, snacks and more. For pantry times and locations, visit www.hawaiifoodbank.org/keiki.

For more information on Food 4 Keiki and its programs, or to start one in your area, contact Marielle Terbio, director of community engagement and strategic initiatives, at marielle@hawaiifoodbank.org or 808-954-7869.

‘OHANA PRODUCE PLUS

‘Ohana Produce Plus is a mass, mobile food distribution program that enables Hawai‘i Foodbank to bring food directly into the communities where it is needed most. ‘Ohana Produce Plus provides hungry keiki, kūpuna, families and individuals greater access to fresh fruits and vegetables plus other supplementary food items.

For more than 20 years, the program has distributed millions of pounds of fresh produce, assorted dry goods and non-perishable food items to underserved communities — all at no cost to its recipients. Participants in this program include families with low income, individuals with disabilities, the homeless, working poor and more. For many people, ‘Ohana Produce Plus is their only source of fresh fruits and vegetables.

Go to “Distribution Times and Locations” at www.hawaiifoodbank.org/ohana to find a location near you. It is recommended that potential beneficiaries of this program call in advance to confirm service hours and requirements.

SENIOR FOOD BOX PROGRAM

This program provides a monthly box of quality USDA food to low-income kūpuna in Hawai‘i.

For participating kūpuna, the Commodity Supplemental Food Program (CSFP) provides more than just food and nourishment. It also helps to combat the poor health conditions often found in kūpuna who are at risk of hunger and experiencing food insecurity. CSFP helps vulnerable kūpuna from having to choose between food and other basic needs. The food in each Senior Food Box can play an important role in combatting the health consequences of senior hunger, and ultimately, can help kūpuna avoid costly hospitalizations and nursing home placements.

Senior Food Boxes are specifically designed to supplement needed sources of nutrients typically lacking in participants’ diets. Boxes may include cereal, grains, dry beans, rice and a variety of canned fruits and vegetables and shelf-stable foods.

Participants must be at least 60 years of age. Each applicant must self-declare that their household income is at or below 130 percent of the US Federal Poverty Income Guidelines for the State of Hawai‘i. Applicants must reside in the service area to which they are applying for. Find other eligibility requirements and distribution locations, and download the application at hawaiifoodbank.org/csfp. Mail it to: Hawai‘i Foodbank, 2611 Kilihau St., Honolulu, HI 96819.

SENIORS FARMERS’ MARKET NUTRITION PROGRAM

The Seniors Farmers’ Market Nutrition Program (SFMNP) is designed to provide low-income kūpuna with access to locally-grown fruits, vegetables, honey and herbs.

Every year, Hawai‘i Foodbank partners with the State of Hawai‘i Office of Community Services and the US Department of Agriculture, Food and Nutrition Service to organize the Senior Farmers’ Market Nutrition Program. Hawai‘i’s SFMNP offers eligible seniors $50 worth of coupons (10 coupons valued at $5 each) to obtain eligible foods without charge from participating farmers, farmers’ markets and roadside stands that have been approved to accept SFMNP coupons. Through SFMNP, kūpuna are provided with nutritious foods as well as education to emphasize the relationship of proper nutrition to good health.

Find other eligibility requirements and locations, and download the application at hawaiifoodbank.org/sfmnp. Mail it to: Hawai‘i Foodbank, 2611 Kilihau St., Honolulu, HI 96819.

HELP NOURISH EVERY MEMBER OF OUR ‘OHANA

As we look toward the holiday season and 2023, let’s join together to help families eat together and achieve long-term food security and address the nutritional needs of each generation. Donate today at https://hawaiifoodbank.org/donate. Volunteer at volunteer@hawaiifoodbank.org. Let’s help ensure that no one in the house goes hungry.

HAWAI‘I FOODBANK, O‘AHU & KAUA‘I
2611 Kilihau St., Honolulu, HI 96819
808-836-3600 | hawaiifoodbank.org
THE FOOD BASKET, HAWAI‘I ISLAND
40 Holomua St., Hilo, HI 96720
808-933-6030 | hawaiifoodbasket.org
MAUI FOOD BANK, MAUI COUNTY
760 Kolu Street, Wailuku, HI 96793
808-243-9500 | mauifoodbank.org

Here in Hawai‘i, the idea of multiple generations sharing meals together under one roof isn’t reserved for just the holidays. Hawai‘i has the highest percentage of multigenerational households in the country, with nearly 8 percent of households statewide classified as multigenerational — at least three generations living under one roof. This household structure represents one…
Giving Your Voice to Charity: Inspiring Real Change With Advocacy

Alzheimer’s Association Hawaii Chapter Community Advocates brought their cause to Capitol Hill in Washington, DC, this year: (L–R) Dr. Poki‘i Balaz, Kathy Wyatt, Amy Truong, Calvin Hara and Ron Shimabuku, the director of Public Policy and Advocacy for Alzheimer’s Association Hawaii Chapter. Courtesy photo.

Especially during this time of year, many of us shift our mindsets to consider how we can spread aloha and do good in the world. Giving back to our community comes in many forms. There are ways that take no money — donating your voice and time. “Activist philanthropy” is a newer term, but it simply relates to people who embrace the role of public advocate to raise awareness and bring precedence to essential issues. These people are speaking up and sharing their stories to inspire real change.

“When my mom was diagnosed with younger-onset Alzheimer’s disease, we felt helpless initially, not knowing what it was, feeling so lost and not knowing what to do,” recalls Amy Truong, community advocate for the Alzheimer’s Association Hawaii Chapter.

“We started realizing that this disease is definitely in our communities, but no one is talking about it. Some people don’t even know what it is.”

Over 200,000 families in the US face the unique challenges of younger-onset Alzheimer’s disease, which has no cure. This form of Alzheimer’s affects people younger than 65 years old. Research has examined the role genetics play, but it’s not fully understood why most cases of younger-onset Alzheimer’s appear at such a young age. First, many families and even doctors don’t expect someone so young to develop Alzheimer’s.

“When she started showing symptoms of cognitive decline in her early fifties, we thought it was because my mom wasn’t working anymore, and like those on summer vacation, you’d lose track of the days,” shares Amy. “When her cognitive abilities declined even further, we knew we had to get her to the doctor. That took some time, and it wasn’t easy to convince her to go to the doctor. Then there was a sense of relief when she got diagnosed, but I didn’t walk out of the doctor’s office with a single brochure on how to receive support, or any idea of how we would move forward and what to expect next. It slowly started changing when we began reaching out to the Alzheimer’s Association and kupuna organizations for support.”

Civic Engagement as a Centerpiece for Charity

Amy’s mom was 59 years old when she was finally diagnosed with younger-onset Alzheimer’s. There was a huge barrier for her family to qualify for insurance through Medicare and additional financial support because her mom was under 65. At first, they were denied, because the government had to be careful of fraudulent applications. But Amy and her father were relentless. She obtained letters of support from the Alzheimer’s Association and Dr. Oanh Meyer from the UC Davis Alzheimer’s Disease Center, where her father was an active participant in Alzheimer’s caregiver research and studies. She went to court and her family kept fighting, but admits her father was close to giving up. He didn’t think they would get approved after being rejected the first time.

“In Asian communities, and other communities of color such as Blacks, Hispanics, Native Hawaiian and Native Americans, there is a stigma in going to the doctor as well as certain levels of mistrust and fear of being mistreated or ignored when you do go,” Amy says. “Our family knew we had to share our experience, especially since we’re going through this disease so much earlier. I don’t want any other family like mine to feel helpless, lost, and confused while their loved one is declining in cognitive and physical abilities.”

In 2018, Amy started volunteering and fundraising for Alzheimer’s disease in her community in full force. She raised the second highest amount of money for the Walk to End Alzheimer’s on O‘ahu and she served as the co-chair for The Longest Day to support the Alzheimer’s Association Hawaii Chapter. Soon, she transitioned her volunteer work over to advocacy and became the Advocacy State Champion. She also served as the Alzheimer’s Association State Ambassador to achieve federal and state policy priorities by engaging with Hawai‘i’s elected officials to increase support for people living with Alzheimer’s disease and their families, and continue research for effective treatment and ultimately, a cure.

During her time as an ambassador, she gave her voice to the cause and saw a direct impact when Congress with the passing of the Supporting Older Americans Act of 2020 — which reauthorized the Older Americans Act (OAA) — and includes key provisions of the Younger-Onset Alzheimer’s Disease Act, which ensures Americans living with Alzheimer’s disease and other dementia will have access to vital and affordable services regardless of age. The bill passed one year before Amy’s mom 65th birthday.

Finding the Courage to Give Your Voice

As it would be for most people, it was difficult for Amy’s dad to take on the caregiving role. Even though she was showing signs of decline at the time, they traveled and saw the world together. Together, they visited Hong Kong, Japan, Vietnam, Jamaica, Mexico and France. Amy’s father didn’t know at the time that those years of traveling were among the last she would be able to undertake. Over time, traveling got more complicated. She would have moments of confusion. But having that time together meant everything to them.

When Amy’s father was feeding her mother at a restaurant, a stranger came up to him and just patted him on the shoulder for encouragement. We can all give the gift of support by acknowledging caregivers with simple words and actions.

As the disease progressed and continues to progress to this day, everyday tasks got even more difficult. She wandered and needed help to get dressed, bathed and fed. Eventually, she became incontinent, and lost her ability to walk and speak.

Amy encouraged her dad to reach out using the Alzheimer’s Helpline, as well as other local organizations that help the aging community and served as a lifeline for their family.

By learning about the warning signs of Alzheimer’s disease (www.alz.org/alzheimers-dementia/10_signs), we can help recognize it and support families early in the game. Starting the conversations and sharing your experiences not only inspires others, but contributes to a pendulum shift to equality.

“Since I joined the Alzheimer’s Association, it is great to see they are now expanding their focus on diversity and research in health disparities in Asian, Black, Hispanic and Native Hawaiian communities,” Amy shares, “Improvements in science must be made for these populations. Our representation rises when we share our voices and make them heard.”

Every action and voice — big or small — will help. We may not all be public speakers, but we can certainly share resources and kind words with a caregiver. And this year, when you’re thinking about your holiday giving list, consider giving your voice to charity. Your voice and your story are precious gifts to those who must confront
Alzheimer’s each and every day.

If you know someone struggling with younger-onset or Alzheimer’s disease, or a related dementia — there is support:
24/7 Helpline 800-272-3900
alz.org/Hawaii
alz.org/help-support/i-have-alz/younger-onset
To join a support group or get more information: 808-591-2771
Donate to the Walk to End Alzheimer’s in your community until Dec. 31, 2022: act.alz.org/aloha

Especially during this time of year, many of us shift our mindsets to consider how we can spread aloha and do good in the world. Giving back to our community comes in many forms. There are ways that take no money — donating your voice and time. “Activist philanthropy” is a newer term, but it…
Beware of ‘InstaScams’

There are always two sides of the same coin. Social media has made it possible for everyone to stay more connected over the years and across the miles. It’s reconnected old friends and kept families close. Unfortunately, it’s also given scammers the ability to become more sophisticated and creative.

From phishing emails to phone scams, there always seems to be a new tactic being used by people trying to get between you and your money. The latest hunting ground is Instagram. But the good news is that by staying alert, you can avoid many common social media scams, including those on Instagram.

First, you must recognize a scam. Here are some common signs:

• You receive messages from people or accounts asking you to claim a prize.
• You receive a message from someone you don’t know requesting money.
• You receive messages from unverified accounts of what seem like large companies or public figures. Verified accounts always have a blue badge with a checkmark near the name.
• A direct message appears to come from a familiar account, but it asks you to click on a suspicious link.
• You receive messages or posts that contain poor spelling and/or grammatical errors from users you don’t recognize.
• Someone claiming to be from Instagram security asks for your private account information — usually under the guise of “securing your account.”
• You receive a request to move your conversation off Instagram and continue it on a less public and less secure setting.

If something feels suspicious, trust your gut. You should never give an unknown person or online account the benefit of the doubt.

Here are a few easy ways to protect yourself:

• Don’t click on suspicious links.
• Make your account private.
• Enable two-factor authentication.
• Check your login activity.
• Block suspicious accounts.
• Research suspicious accounts.

If you have any questions or think you may be a victim of fraud, contact your financial institution immediately.

Most financial institutions have fraud prevention and protection measures in place that can help you minimize or eliminate the damage. Always stay informed, stay alert and remember that if it seems too good to be true, it is.

GATHER FEDERAL CREDIT UNION
(Kukui Grove, Līhu‘e, Kapa‘a, Kōloa, ‘Ele‘ele, Waimea)
808-245-6791 | info@gatherfcu.org
gatherfcu.org

There are always two sides of the same coin. Social media has made it possible for everyone to stay more connected over the years and across the miles. It’s reconnected old friends and kept families close. Unfortunately, it’s also given scammers the ability to become more sophisticated and creative.
Facing Age Discrimination

As we get older, what at first seems to be respectful and benign behavior begins to morph into microaggressions. “He is way too old to be trying that!” “Look what she is wearing — at her age!” “Production will slow down if we hire him.”

A microaggression is a comment or action that negatively targets a marginalized group of people, including seniors. Whether intentional or accidental, it’s a form of discrimination. People who use microaggressions may mean no harm to a person or group, but it can still hurt.

If we are honest, it is easy to pinpoint our own feelings about aging. Aging does frequently result in restrictions and it often does impact our abilities. But just as with other forms of discrimination, the differences we note shouldn’t be our primary impression.

Aging is natural. So, before you discover that old man or lady in the mirror looking back at you, learn how to relate to older individuals as individuals — not a silver tsunami, not a societal burden, not an obligation — as a person.

THE CAREGIVER FOUNDATION (501(c) 3 nonprofit)
926 3rd St., Pearl City, HI 96782
808-625-3782 | info@thecaregiverfoundation.org
www.thecaregiverfoundation.org

While we are taught to treat those of a different race or religion equitably, seniors often face age discrimination. It first appears as an attempt to be helpful. Someone holds a door open for us. The bus waits a little longer for us to climb aboard. The bank teller smiles more as he hones his…
Follow the Medicare Road

Not too long ago, my extended family enjoyed getting all the cousins together to watch “The Wizard of Oz” every year. We loved watching Dorothy follow the yellow brick road to Oz. It was a great bonding activity. Now those same family members are calling to ask for help with Medicare. Where did the time go?

Recently, a relative called about a letter from his Medicare plan. It explained that a medication he takes regularly was covered as a courtesy but would not be filled again. My cousin was as shocked and disappointed as Dorothy was when she pulled the curtain back and found that Oz the Great and Powerful was not what she expected. My cousin blamed Medicare, the insurance plan and the sales agent. Here are the steps I offered.

Step One: Call the plan to determine if the drug requires prior authorization, is subject to quantity limits or step therapy rules.

Step Two: Contact the prescribing doctor’s office and have them call the plan to provide additional documentation based on the drug coverage rules.

Step Three: Contact your plan to file an appeal and if necessary, ask for an expedited review.

My cousin learned his medication was subject to prior authorization rules. The doctor contacted the insurance company and it will be covered.

With a little help along the way, everyone should be able to follow the Medicare road and resolve any bumps along the way.

GET2INSURANCE.COM FAMILY OFFICE
1003 Bishop St., Ste. 2700, Honolulu, HI 96813
800-226-3660 | martha@get2insurance.com
www.Get2insurance.com

Not too long ago, my extended family enjoyed getting all the cousins together to watch “The Wizard of Oz” every year. We loved watching Dorothy follow the yellow brick road to Oz. It was a great bonding activity. Now those same family members are calling to ask for help with Medicare. Where did the time…
The Slap Heard Around the World

Last March, many witnessed the slap that was heard round the world. The unrehearsed and unscripted incident played out in front of the planet’s best actors, with 17 million viewers watching from home. It occurred in supposedly one of most civilized and curated places in the land. But everyone saw that even “winners” are not immune from knee-jerk reactions when messages perceived as offensive produce hurt feelings.

The incident will ultimately change the way we look at these shocking outbursts after words perceived as insults are spoken.

It will also be life-changing for another group of people out of the glare of the lights and cameras — family members who routinely slap others in their own homes. Ranging from verbal to physical abuse, they push, bully and bruise mothers, fathers, siblings and children on a regular basis.

How should they react to regain balance? They can yell, strike back, disarm the incident with a humor or simply leave the scene, while hoping that the behavior will cease. But millions suffer in silence. They may become enablers of further violence if they don’t know where or how to draw the line. There are words and ways to handle abuse so they can calmly take their rightful place as heroes, not merely survivors.

ANNETTE PANG-LIFE COACH VILLAGE, LLC
2383 Beckwith St., Honolulu, HI 96822
808-372-3478 | ap@annettepang.com
www.annettepang.com

Last March, many witnessed the slap that was heard round the world. The unrehearsed and unscripted incident played out in front of the planet’s best actors, with 17 million viewers watching from home. It occurred in supposedly one of most civilized and curated places in the land. But everyone saw that even “winners” are not…